Sorry to all of you February babies but I can't stand February! It has always been such a drag for me. It's like I can't deal with it! When I was in Law School we had something called the Feb. Club. Basically, everyone went to a different bar everynight and drank their February blues away.

So what specifically do I have a problem with February, well...

There is the cold weather...

Then there is the lack of sunlight...

The only thing left to do is eat and watch TV!!!


God, please help me deal with February!!!

Regarding the posting of pictures from the web. After doing my last post I realize how easy it is to go out and download stuff from the internet. What I want to be careful about is the legality of it all. How do I know what pictures/images are OK to post? Other than making sure that I properly cite my sources is there anything else I should be doing?

The pictures add a whole new element and I do so love blogging, but I want to do it right!!! Thanks.

I'd like to share one of my favorite pictures with everyone. It's entitled "Cupid with the Wheel of Fortune" and was painted by Tiziano Vecellio Titian in Oil on canvas during the The High Renaissance epoch in c. 1520.

I visited the National Gallery of Art in Washington, DC some years ago and came across it. Immediately, I loved it and its has stayed with me ever since then.

What was shocking and revealing at the same time was that here you had CUPID, the god of love, in the same picture with a skull which symbolizes sorrow, among other things, to me! What's up with this nice cute little fellow who goes around making people fall in love hanging out with death?

Now, I'm not an Art History major nor do I claim to know what the painter was trying to convey, this is just MY INTERPRETATION!

To me it seemed to be saying something about the pains of passion and the peril of love.

Anyway, I'm going to make this short because I'm not exactly sure what I want to say except the warning "BE CAREFUL WHO YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH" comes to mind...

P.S. The trip went OK this weekend! I stuck to my guns and told him that I was staying with the kids till the end of the year. I was firm on some points and wishy washy on others. Now the ball is in his court. The ultimatum as neither rescinded or acted upon. Like I guess a lot of other couples who don't know their fate we just let it hang...

Sorry, I've lied to you, my love...Sorry, I've lied to myself.

I didn't tell you that I felt like I was disappearing or you didn't listen...I CAN'T REMEMBER.

I did it, well, because I didn't trust you or I didn't trust myself...I DON'T KNOW WHY.

I did it because I was afraid of your reaction, because I didn't believe enough in myslf...I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND.

And now it's hard to find myself in all of this, hard to determine the integrity of my words...hard to feel the love between us.

I've lost the demarcation point between the truth and the lies...and now we are at an ultimatum point.

I've lied and I'm sorry.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Poem inspired by the song below. I'm on my way to visit Steve this evening. Please wish me strength to not lie, to believe in myself, and have courage. I will tell him that I will being staying with my children through the end of the school year. I won't be blogging while I'm there but will return Sunday night. Thanks to all of you for you kind words and support. I take all of you with me in my heart.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pushing Me Away
Linkin Park
(Hybrid Theory)

I've lied to you
The same way that I always do
This is the last smile
That I'll fake for the sake of being with you

Everything falls apart
Even the people who never frown eventually break down
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
Everything has to end
You'll soon find we're out of time left to watch it all unwind
The sacrifice is never knowing

Why I never walked away
Why I played myself this way
Now I see your testing me pushes me away

I've tried like you
To do everything you wanted too
This is the last time
I'll take the blame for the sake of being with you

Everything falls apart
Even the people who never frown eventually break down
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
Everything has to end
You'll soon find we're out of time left to watch it all unwind
The sacrifice is never knowing

Why I never walked away
Why I played myself this way
Now I see your testing me pushes me away

We're all out of time
This is how we find how it all unwinds
The sacrifice of hiding in a lie
We're all out of time
This is how we find how it all unwinds
The sacrifice is never knowing

Why I never walked away
Why I played myself this way
Now I see your testing me pushes me away

Pushes me away...
Pushes my away...

Couple of days ago Whit asked for nominees for the Best/Worst simple song lyrics. Here's my nominee for Best. I recommend ANYTHING from Devo for Worst. Anyway, hope it brings back some good memories...

Changes
David Bowie

I still don't know what I was waiting for
And my time was running wild
A million dead-end streets
Every time I thought I'd got it made
It seemed the taste was not so sweet
So I turned myself to face me
But I've never caught a glimpse
Of how the others must see the faker
I'm much too fast to take that test

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Don't want to be a richer man
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Just gonna have to be a different man
Time may change me
But I can't trace time

I watch the ripples change their size
But never leave the stream
Of warm impermanence and
So the days float through my eyes
But still the days seem the same
And these children that you spit on
As they try to change their worlds
Are immune to your consultations
They're quite aware of what they're going through

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Don't tell t hem to grow up and out of it
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Where's your shame
You've left us up to our necks in it
Time may change me
But you can't trace time

Strange fascination, fascinating me
Changes are taking the pace I'm going through

Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Oh, look out you rock 'n rollers
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes
(Turn and face the strain)
Ch-ch-Changes
Pretty soon you're gonna get a little older
Time may change me
But I can't trace time
I said that time may change me
But I can't trace time